Whether it’s waiting for our perfect someone or working hard towards a particular goal, there’s at least a moment (or more) when it feels like we need to just throw in the towel. It’s times like these that we need to hear five encouraging reminders for the girl who feels like giving up.
It’s in those moments of weakness—exhaustion, the blues, a set-back—when feelings of doubts and defeat can creep in. Whatever it is that we are holding out for or striving to achieve can be accomplished. Usually, the greatest temptation to give up is when the end of the journey is near and success is just right around the corner.
So, here are some encouragements to consider when it gets tough:
- Everyone ebbs and flows. One moment we may feel on top of the world and the next, but the next we may cry ourselves to sleep. It is completely normal to have highs and lows. Having said that, even though others may experience a similar rollercoaster of emotions at times, it doesn’t mean we should compare the story of others to ours. We all have different stories. Even if someone we know has been through similar experiences, we don’t know the mess of it and they may be in a different chapter than we are. When we are down, we need to remember to get on the phone or go see that friend or family member who will give us the encouragement we need to push through it and persevere. We need to stay focused and keep our eyes on the prize, and the reward will be so sweet at the end.
- A setback doesn’t mean it’s over. When we encounter something unexpected, it isn’t the end. We just need to have a good cry, pull ourselves together and get back in the game. Detours are not destinations, and roadblocks can be stepping stones.
- If a guy is the cause: as hard as it may be, we need to focus on forgiving him if he did something stupid (because unforgiveness is drinking poison and expecting the other to die) and move on with the understanding that he wasn’t our match. Block him from social media if you have to so you are not tempted to digitally stalk him – and wish him the best. Be the bigger person.
- If it’s a financial issue or other snag in the game-plan: if the setback was a consequence of something you did, make it right and learn from the experience. Don’t let it paralyze you—we are only human and tend to make mistakes. It is through our experiences that we mature and develop into who we are to become. Do research or talk to people who can help point you in the direction to get things back on track. Make sure the budget is established or adjusted and keep rolling ahead.
- Remember the progress. It’s not about the journey and the tough roads traveled, it’s about the destination. However, when we have a vision with obstacles with hurdles, it can be hard to see past our current situation sometimes. We want to be there now—right now—not in three to five years. We need to keep in mind that even though we are not where we want to be, at least we are not where we have been. As long as we keep moving in the right direction and do what we can to avoid things that will cause us to stumble, we are making progress. Every step of the way, we can look back for reminders of the distance we have come.
- When the overall journey seems daunting, focus on one step at a time. Feeling overwhelmed is why many give up, sometimes even before they get started. We are standing at ground level looking up at a huge mountain, wondering how in the world we are ever going to make it up. The first step is the hardest, but once we move, it’s all about the momentum. To keep focused, post a big dry erase board with bullet-points that we can check off as we go. That way, we can see the progress throughout the process.
- The only thing out of this whole experience that we will regret is giving up. — Not the hard work or the sense of accomplishment, but the giving up.
Take every day one day at a time and surround yourself with a support group. <3