If you know a couple you care about who has recently lost a pregnancy, it can make you feel helpless when trying to support them. You want to be helpful and offer your help, but you also want to give them space and time to process. Here are a few ways to show you care while giving them space to heal.
1.) Cook meals or pick up groceries for them. It can be hard to go back to day-to-day life when experiencing a loss. This is a beneficial way to show you care while also taking on some of the daily burdens.
2.) Be there to listen. They might not want to talk for a while, but it is important to let them know you are there for them. Give them space, but also make it clear that you are open to talking when they are ready.
3.) Ask them what they need. Just be upfront. Ask them if they need space, help around the house or anything else that you can assist with. Sometimes it’s hard to ask for help, so offering so they don’t have to ask is a good way to show your support.
4.) Get them a gift to memorialize their child. This can be a really special way to show your support and help them through the grieving process.
5.) Check in on them, even if they want space. It can be as simple as a kind text or a phone call. You don’t want to be pushy, but let them know you care.
6.) Be conscious of your words. It could be easy to want to console someone and end up saying the wrong thing even if it was with the best intentions. Planning the future, saying things like you can try again, maybe it was for the best, when do you plan to try in the future.. are all harmful things to say. This is a time to listen more than to speak.
The truth is, pregnancy loss is an emotional, physical, and spiritual process that takes time to heal from. There truly is no timeline for healing, so try to be an ear to listen and a shoulder to cry on.
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